Tuesday, 27 July 2010

The course of true love can be wonky

Well it's been nearly a month now since the first part of 'From Russia With Love and Guns' was posted here, and yet I've had virtually zero interest from Hollywood, even though there's loads of awesome action and some romance as well. It's also miles better than most of the rubbish that Hollywood makes these days.

I'll probably post some more of the script, but to be honest I've lost interest in doing it at the moment, mainly because of all the 'relationship issues' I've been having lately. Don't get me wrong, I know that love can be a rocky voyage, and with Natalia and myself it's no different, but the woman seems obsessed with money. Yes, she works down a mine and is also a pole dancer and keeps almost having to almost marry rich old men, but now she just goes on and on about that twenty grand, and practically ignored my script (which is part autobiographical). Anyway, I think she suggested a trial separation. Well here's the MSN feed:

NeonStudXXL - Hello sexy baby how are you?

Natalia1181 - What you want?

NeonStudXXL - To share my love with you my lovely lady.

Natalia1181 - Oh god. It is you.

NeonStudXXL - Yes, and I'm feeling very sexy.

Natalia1181 - Whatever. You have money?

NeonStudXXL - Look, I've been through this. I can't get the money until somebody buys my script. Besides my script is dedicated to you, for being such a sexy lady.

Natalia1181 - AARRGH! You are doing in my head! You waste my time! I need money! You don't even have bank account!

NeonStudXXL - As I explained I'm technically under police protection. Hence my lack of funds.

Natalia1181 - I think you are wasting my time. You are taking piss.

NeonStudXXL - Erm? Would I go to the hassle of writing almost 4 FULL pages of script if I wasn't serious? I very much think NOT.

Natalia1181 - You are wrong in head. Leave me alone until you send me money.

NeonStudXXL - Pfft! You think I can stop loving you like that? Oh no, love isn't something you can switch on and off like a light. Love is like a fire it burns in your heart and doesn't ever go out.

NeonStudXXL - No, love isn't like a fire. It's more like a light, but with a dimmer switch that can't be switched off. But the brightness changes.

Natalia1181 - Please stop! I am not caring! You have wasted my time.

NeonStudXXL - And there are no power cuts.

NeonStudXXL - I can't stop loving you Natalia.

Natalia1181 - I am not Natalia I am Pavel. I am a man!

NeonStudXXL - ? :¬/

NeonStudXXL - Ahhh. No, this isn't Cassablanca my darling. I know that you love me and don't want to hurt me. But you're not Burt Lancaster and I'm not that woman who was in it. Our love will prevail.

Natalia1181 - Please. Please stop messaging me. I am man. I was try to extort money.

NeonStudXXL - No my darling. You shall get your money.

------Natalia1181 has disconnected----------

In light of these recent developments I've taken Grigore from the Chick 'n Fish up on his offer of help. Apparently he knows some guys who can lend me money even if I've got bad credit history. Then I'll be able to get that cash over to Natalia and we can be together at last.

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